


Lay Beside Me, Under Wicked Sky

by AvaCelt



Series: Gothic Horror Prompt Fills - 2020 [7]
Category: Black Clover - Tabata Yuki (Anime & Manga)
Genre: Angst, Dysfunctional Family, Emotional/Psychological Abuse, Family Bonding, Family Feels, Family Issues, Gaslighting, Gen, Inspired by Edgar Allan Poe, Inspired by the Fall of the House of Usher, one-sided AsuNoelle
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-01
Updated: 2020-10-01
Packaged: 2021-03-07 19:47:22
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,877
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26743111
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AvaCelt/pseuds/AvaCelt
Summary: Noelle leaves, and the chips fall where they do. [Silva family!fic, post-canon]
Relationships: Asta/Noelle Silva, Nebra Silva & Noelle Silva & Nozel Silva & Solid Silva
Series: Gothic Horror Prompt Fills - 2020 [7]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1900357
Comments: 9
Kudos: 63





	Lay Beside Me, Under Wicked Sky

**Author's Note:**

> Title is borrowed from Metallica's _Unforgiven II_.

At seventeen, Noelle leaves for good.

Nozel receives the news too late, of course. There are celebrations to host, formal balls and gender-segregated parties abound, so that they can spread the word that Spade has fallen to Clover Kingdom's feet. As befitting a prince of a royal house, Nozel is preoccupied with guests when his estranged little sister comes to pay a visit. He has pretenses to keep up, after all, so when one of the house's footmen notifies him that Noelle has arrived, Nozel waves him away and refocuses his attention to the high nobility with a direct line to the Kira Clover clan.

And so, at the age of seventeen, Noelle leaves without saying goodbye, and Nozel can blame no one but himself.

His father tells him the next day, after all of the guests have gone home, and preparations for the next celebration is already underway. Nozel's Silver Eagle duties are on hold for the time being, just like the other squads who've received extended paid leave so that they can celebrate their victory with their own families, so the day begins like any other day for Nozel, a day spent keeping up pretenses that don't matter, in the name of a woman who's been dead for almost twenty years.

Perhaps that's why his father tells him of Noelle's departure while he is taking his morning tea.

“She's decided to follow the demon boy and his friends,” his father tells him, eyes fixed to the morning paper while Nozel's teacup freezes midway to his lips. “Her name and title were changed at the barrister's yesterday morning. It seems she's taken up Acier's family name now. I asked our barrister to see if any of Acier's clan would contest her decision to take their name, but he says there won't be any problems since she's not in line to inherit anything from the clan.”

Nozel sets down his teacup and looks at the older Silva lounging in his cushioned hardback seat. His eyes are still on the paper. Nebra and Solid are quiet, their own eyes fixed on their breakfast as the Silva patriarch takes a sip of his coffee before turning a page of his newspaper.

Several seconds pass before the patriarch speaks again. By then, Nozel's palm is bleeding with the nails that have broken through his skin.

“It's likely she won't be returning. There's little doubt the demon boy will ever be able to cross our borders again unless he rids himself of the demon first. If he does, you may see her again.”

Which means Nozel won't, because Nozel was there when Asta accepted the demon's hand for eternity, witnessed an unholy betrothal like no other.

“Why didn't you call for me?” Nozel asks, voice as icy as the snow falling listlessly outside.

The Silva patriarch still doesn't lift his gaze from the paper. “What good would have come from that?”

“She-”

“She left,” the patriarch interrupts before Nozel can snap, before he can shove the tea and cakes and cutlery off the table, and lunge over to the old man turning his newspaper nonchalantly. “She's brought enough shame to the house with her poor control over her magic, so perhaps some time away will do her good.”

“She's your daughter,” Nozel hisses. Nebra and Solid's eyes jump fearfully to his enraged countenance, but he can't help himself, not anymore. She's gone, their mother's last gift to their family is gone, and Nozel has no more excuses left.

The old man finally looks at Nozel, and Nozel wants to scream.

“She is,” the old man confirms, as if Nozel is an idiot, “and she's also Acier's daughter. She can take her mother's name if she so desires.”

The animosity crawls around in his stomach and threatens to burst from his core. “That's not the point,” he enunciates coldly, as if talking to a child and not his own father. “Why didn't you stop her?”

_Why didn't you tell her the truth?_

“Why would I?”

And then Nozel shuts his mouth, because he realizes that no matter what happens, no matter how many lives Noelle saves, she _still_ won't be worthy of the truth, not in their father's eyes. The old man's gaze has already returned to his paper and tea, and his siblings have followed suit, turning their attention to their useless teacups and cold cutlery, because Noelle doesn't matter, they've made it so that she _never_ matters.

Their father doesn't know that Noelle knows the truth. He doesn't know that Nozel enlisted Dorothy Unsworth's help to make sure Noelle was prepared for her fight against Megicula, doesn't know that Nozel carries so much shame in his heart that he oftentimes wishes that _he'd_ been cursed instead of their mother.

Nebra and Solid don't know, and Nozel had sworn he'd never tell, but he can't help himself, not when a portrait of their mother sits in the great dining hall, not when Nozel has to answer to her ghost when he himself finally perishes.

“Why didn't you tell her?” Nozel asks finally. Nebra and Solid look at him again, confusion in their eyes, but Nozel is focused entirely on their father, the old man, the head of House of Silva.

This time, the old man closes his paper before lifting his gaze. His father's eyes are still as grey as an overcast sky.

“Does it really matter anymore? The demon is no longer a threat, and she's chosen the demon boy anyway. The irony of it all did make me chuckle when she arrived with the news last night, but I suppose irony is all that's left. I don't think there's any point in shattering her worldview now. It's all said and done, so we can finally move on.”

“There are _more_ demons?” Solid blurts out incredulously before slapping a hand over his mouth and fearfully casting his gaze to his lap. Nebra's silent, but her eyes are pleading for answers, answers that don't matter anymore.

“So you just let her leave thinking that we hate her?” Nozel finds himself whispering, because he's an idiot, a useless older brother, a man who can't even keep his own family together.

“Don't you?” The old man inquires, as if asking about the weather. “You didn't seem to have any reservations when you publicly shamed her. I've never seen you stop your brother and sister from bullying her. You didn't even stop her when she joined that disgusting foreigner's squad. Don't tell me your conscience weighs heavily on your soul, son, not after everything you've done and let happen.”

“Doesn't yours?”

“No,” says the old man, “it doesn't.”

“Father, what are you and big brother talking about?” Nebra asks finally, because Solid is shaking in his seat, and Nozel is crying, he's crying because there's a portrait of his mother watching him, shaming him for his sins.

“Why don't you ask your brother?” The old man sighs. “I'd never intended to tell you lot anything, but it seems my eldest here has other plans.” The old man turns his attention back to Nozel. “Tell your sister the truth, son. Tell her why Noelle was cast out.”

“You bastard,” Nozel croaks hollowly.

“I may be a bastard, but I'm still royalty, and as royalty, I have a duty to my realm. It's unfortunate that Noelle's feelings weren't considered, but what's done is done. Our family is safe, and the demons are gone – even if did cost us Noelle.”

And that's the truth, isn't it? That Noelle had always been the spare, had been too young, too low on the totem pole to matter to their father. The animosity transforms into regret. His chest hurts. It hurts because Noelle knows, because Nozel will have to tell Nebra and Solid the truth, but more than anything, Nozel will have to admit his guilt and force Nebra and Solid to admit theirs without offering them an opportunity to seek forgiveness.

Because Noelle is gone. Acier's last gift to their family is gone.

The old man leaves without finishing his tea. Nozel's ears follow his footsteps until they fade entirely.

“Big brother?” Solid stammers, the second the old man is out of earshot. “What's Father talking about? What _about_ demons... and Noelle?”

Nozel lifts his gaze to Acier's portrait, praying for guidance.

Later, when Solid and Nebra are shell-shocked and gathered on his bed, Nozel proffers them Acier's hand-written letters. Each letter had been addressed to a different Silva child, and all of them had been penned during their mother's pregnancy with Noelle.

There are almost two hundred letters in Acier's handwriting, and a quarter of them are for Noelle, letters Noelle will never read because Noelle is gone.

Solid cries in Nebra's lap, clutching their mother's locket and a bunch of letters. Nebra doesn't touch hers, can't, because Noelle's will never be read by the person they belong to, because Noelle will never return.

And that's the other realization, the one that kills Nozel the most, the one he will never forgive himself for – the realization that Noelle has _chosen_ to forsake them.

It burns. It burns because Nozel can't blame her, because their bastard father is right, because they let the charades go on for so long that Noelle _herself_ didn't think it beneficial to interrupt their festivities to say goodbye, because what's done is done, and Acier's last gift has finally found a family that truly deserves her.

Nozel knows that if Acier was still alive, she'd love the demon boy who'd stolen her daughter's heart, treat him as if he were a member of her brood because Acier was a good woman and a good mother, whereas Nozel has failed in the only duty that has ever mattered – the duty of being a big brother.

“We can find the little brat,” Nebra says scathingly, tears streaming down her pink cheeks. “How dare she leave without an audience with her elders! Unspeakable... Mother would never have allowed it.”

“That oaf of a captain is easy to track,” Solid adds with a sob. “Stupid brat...”

And suddenly, there's hope again, and Nozel can't help but turn to the small photograph of their mother sitting on his armoire. She's smiling, and it's a smile Nozel wishes he could see on Noelle's face. He doesn't remember ever seeing Noelle smile. Perhaps he can change that when they find her. Maybe there's a chance this _doesn't_ end here, not today, not in a house devoid of love and warmth.

“Then let's find her,” Nozel whispers finally.

He does it subconsciously, because shame isn't even in _question_ anymore. Nebra cries on one shoulder, while Solid cries on the other, and Nozel holds them tight and close, because he has a duty to fulfill, and it'll be a cold day in Hell before he lets the House of Silva crumble beneath their bastard father's fist.

Because Noelle is their little sister, and Nozel will have to at least try, even if she doesn't accept their love, because she's a woman now, and she has the right to make her own choices.

But Nozel will try, they _all_ will. It's what Acier would have wanted, and Nozel won't let her down – not again.


End file.
